Monday, September 8, 2014

Breath of Life: A Testimony

We all have a testimony. Some of us have multiple ones. As we get older, new experiences create new stories, leading to new testimonies.

Today, I want to publicly share one of mine.

This testimony is not one of conversion, or a huge religious 180 degree spin from a life of hardship. But it is where God found me, and continues to every day.

Although it seems so long ago now, there was a time where my health consumed my thoughts. My sophomore year of high school, I began to have problems. I was diagnosed with asthma and many allergies, and given medications and inhalers to fix the problem.

Time went on, and the medications didn't help. The doses were increased, different types of inhalers were introduced, and my junior year became a year of dependency on 10 pills and 3 inhalers daily, one of which was an addictive steroid. If I didn't take my medicine, I would go through withdrawals and couldn't function. On top of all this, I found out much later that during everything I had chronic mononucleosis as well. (This is different than the "kissing disease". This one can last up to a year, and debilitates your body, making you weak and unable to function. Physical activity and living a normal life can actually damage the liver during this sickness.)

In spite of everything, I kept going. I took AP/IB classes, did XC Running and Skiing, Flag Football and Softball, and continued all my activities out of school as well. Every day, my strength waned more and more, and it was harder by the day to catch enough air to successfully breathe. Every moment hurt.

At this point, I had dreams to play softball in college. I had goals to successfully complete undergrad, and go to medical school. My new dreams, however, became ones in which I could walk up stairs without losing my breath, stop gaining weight from all my medications, and wake up each morning without the struggle of breathing. We knew it was time to do something.

My senior year was full of struggle, and doctor appointments. My family was worried, I was worried, and we prayed constantly. But I didn't tell most people how bad it really was.

Another year and dozens of doctor appointments later, God answered our prayers. I had surgery to remove my adenoids and was diagnosed with Vocal Chord Dysfunction. For the next 6 months, however, I struggled to wean off of my medicines. Getting away from my dependency on the inhalers and pills took time, tears, and solely the strength of God.

Today, I can wake up and breathe. I thank God every day for how far he brought me. Now, I have only 2 pills, and they are both over-the-counter for allergies. I no longer use an inhaler. This doesn't mean there aren't times of struggle though. Last winter, I had to use an emergency inhaler once. Exercise and cold still grab at my throat and threaten to take my breath away.

But, something's different. I'm no longer afraid. There are so many Bible verses about worry and anxiety, but one sticks out to me as I look back at the past 3 years: "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." John 14:27.

The God of the universe knows what He's doing. He gives us the breath of life, and I have never been more thankful for that. He gave it to me, and He can take it away. But, these past 3 years made me learn that His timing is above all, and He knows the plans He has for me; greater than any I can think for myself. And I have found freedom in that.

So to conclude my testimony, I can stand here and say that God is good. He never left, and never will. Not only did He walk every step of the way with me, He blessed me beyond anything I ever imagined. All the dreams and goals I gave up, He reinstated. I am now playing college ball, in undergrad studying chemistry, and set on a track to go to medical school. Every day, the amount of blessings God reveals blows my mind.

I can now make it through softball practice with my breath still in tact. I even was able to run a total of 150 miles this summer. I can focus on my school work because I am no longer going through medication withdrawals. I discovered an amazing group of support and love from my family and close friends. And I drew closer to God than I have ever been in my life.

So I write this to glorify God. I would not be where I am without Him.

Just like He was there for me, even the moments during those 3 years when it didn't feel like it, he is there for you too. And never leaves.

And for that, I am eternally grateful.

"The Spirit of God has made me, and the breath of the Almighty gives
me life." Job 33:4

DTI

No comments:

Post a Comment